Am I the Only Mother Who…


Am I the only mother who…


Thinks of dropping off her kids 6 miles from the house––in a blizzard because they are fighting.


Always knows the cost of a flight to Mexico. Just in case I need a little “me” time.


Has all the good chocolate in the bathroom closet. Or the safe.


Sees a call from the school during a workout and finishes the work out. They’ll always call back.


Tells my child to stop touching me before I go bananas.


Wishes that the school didn’t send 15 notifications about snow days so they kids will just go to bed so I can go to bed and read about fictional lives.


Resents PowerSchool for constantly telling me “what’s up.”


Prays we don’t get in a wreck in the car circle because I am wearing a bathrobe and snow boots. And no actual clothes.


Tells my kid we are out of syrup so he will stop having Elf moments and leaving syrupy paw prints all over the kitchen.


Drinks an Angry Orchard in the bathroom for a mini vacay (that was just once so and it’s practically apple juice, so you know, stop judging me, lol.)


Does the Jacob’s ladder at the gym AFTER the workout because it’s more fun and relaxing than cleaning the house.


Counts my Easter Peeps before leaving the house and when I return (to keep an eye on my kids sugar intake of course.)


Has a thing called “snack dinner” (insert glitter cannon), which is propped up to sound like a carnival of epic proportions but it’s really just a smorgasbord of crap from the fridge with questionable remaining minutes of quality.


Being a good mom is really subjective you know. Some days are Mary Poppins days. Some days are Bloody Mary Days. Some are like a scene from The Shining. But some dang reason, our kids love us anyway. So bask in that for a minute. You are loved unconditionally. Weird isn’t it?


Like little mini Frankensteins, they were created to love us. Well not really. But it’s fun to imagine.


Keep crushing it mom. One day their counselor will enjoy the stories.


5 thoughts on “Am I the Only Mother Who…

  1. Needed this today!!! Just when I think I’m a horrible mom and didn’t totally “Poppins” it out today, you remind me that we are human and our kids still love us, perfection or not 😍. And dang! Why can’t we get snow days in California!!! Lol

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